End Game.

Alright, lads. It's hard to root for a team that melts into a quivering puddle of goo at the least sign of adversity but as much as it pains me, I continue to do it. I've tried my best to get you to win: Ignoring you? Doesn't work. I've tried lining up all of my talismans...nothing.

So let's have a frank chat: All that you have to do today is win one, just one little game. Preferably, you'd win the first game and take the pressure off of John Lackey but either game will do; the other game won't matter as much, as long as you win one.

Now, perhaps it's been so long since you've won a baseball game that you'd like a refresher on how to do it. Never fear, that's why I'm here. There's no big trick to it. It's really pretty simple. The way to win at baseball is to score more runs than the other team. There are a couple of ways that this easy-peasy little goal can be accomplished, 1. (The preferred method with Wake and Burnett pitching) Use brute force and beat the hell out of the baseball. Do not, however, swing at the first pitch until it has been established that today, the inbred-hayseed can throw a strike. 2. The second method is dicier with Wake pitching, given that he can lose it in a heartbeat and Saltalamacchia struggles to catch the damn ball, but using this method you would limit the number of runs that you allow the other team to score. Simple, right?

There was a time, not all that long ago actually, when asking this team to score more runs than the other team wouldn't have seemed like a ludicrous request and, hopefully, today it won't be. As for tomorrow? Well, who knows.