Dear Santa: Part the Fifth.

As I see it, one of the truths of the holiday season is that people seem compelled to throw fancy parties. We invite people into our homes--friends, family, neighbors, co-workers--people for whom we wouldn't make any extra effort any other time of the year but at Christmas-time we dress up for them. We make them roasts. We serve them expensive wines and fancy appetizers. The more confident among us attempt complicated desserts, the rest of us go to the bakery. China that was stored away on January 2 is dusted off and makes its annual appearance at the end of November. We chat for a few hours, reminisce, catch-up and them send them on their merry way, fat and happy. If we are going to host these expensive shin-digs, then what better way could there be to protect the wood of your credenza while they're going on than with a winter-themed Boston Red Sox table runner?

Bits and Pieces: Twinies.

Two little pieces of news on look-alikes Jason Bay and Jed Lowrie today.

Jed Lowrie has (presumably) returned home to Oregon for the holiday. While there, he stopped by his old middle school to participate in an assembly in his honor.

The Canadian Baseball Hall of Fame and Museum (who knew that such a place existed?) gives out the Tip O'Neil Award to the best Canadian player in professional baseball and among those being considered? Jason Bay. Bay took home the award twice before in 2004 and 2005. The public is encouraged to vote (they didn't make it very easy though.) The award will be announced on December 12.

Spring Ahead! (Really. It's true.)

Turkey and Cranberry Sauce? Forget it. Visions of sugar plums? Hardly. Break out the sunglasses, the Red Sox released their spring training schedule today.

The first game is on February 25 against the Twins. Then it's a month filled with the Pirates, Tampa Bay, the Reds, the Orioles, the Marlins, the Cards, the Yanks, the Jays, the Phils, the Tigers, and the Braves (with some repeats in there.) The final Florida game is against the Twins on April 2. They then play two in Queens on April 3 and 4, before jetting back home to open the season at Fenway on April 6 against Tampa Bay.

It's an occasion that requires the ubiquitous: Woot!

H-O-. You Callin' Me a Ho?

The online auction for David Ortiz's Celebrity Golf Classic has opened. The man has arranged for some truly fabulous lots. They range from the more ordinary--signed bats and balls (I really might bid for Coco's shoes-I was considering dropping a lot of cash on a shirt that he had worn but shoes? I love shoes!) to the more ritzy--vacations, play golf with Mark Wahlberg, learn to pitch from Jonathan Papelbon type prizes. The one that really caught my eye? Play a game of HORSE with David and Ray Allen.

It'd be terribly unfair and I'm pretty sure I could predict the winner right now. Let's see: Two giant men, at least one of whom is very good at basketball, and me. Yeah, that would be a short game. I had such a crush on Ray Allen when he was at UCONN, though. It would probably be a lot of fun even if it only took a few minutes for me to lose.

The bidding closes on December 5.

Here's a Story 'Bout a Man Named Werner.

The Brady Center to Prevent Gun Violence honored Red Sox chairman Tom Werner on November 9th by giving him the Sarah Brady Visionary Award at their Target for a Safe America Gala. He was given the honor because of his financial support of their effort to keep guns out of the hands of criminals by creating sensible gun laws. It's certainly a worthy cause. Congratulations to him.

Dear Santa: Goes Fourth.

Look Ma! Just like the pros wear!

You too can be the proud owner of Red Sox Crocs. Terrorized by nightmares of the galoshes your mother used to make you wear in the spring and concerned that sticking your feet in rubber shoes will once again return them to that hot, sweaty state? Fear not. The good folks at Crocs have addressed this concern by selling their product replete with holes for both cooling and wafting away the odor caused by foot-sweat.

Worried that they are clunky, hideously ugly shoes? Psshaw. They're all the rage (or, at least, they were a couple of years ago.) Don't let naysayer-fashionistas prevent you from enjoying these lovely shoes.

Happy Birthday Jonathan!

One year ago I wished Jonathan Papelbon a happy twenty-seventh birthday and embarked on this silly birthday project. Having come full circle, Papelbon turns twenty-eight today. He's an idiot and an odd-duck but I love him dearly. So, here's to a continually healthy shoulder, the safe arrival of the bambinos, and a return to dominance to 2009.

I don't recall where I found the scan from Papelbon's high school yearbook (I did edit out the girl though--seemed like the right thing to do.) Those are quite the duds though.

Also, I just wanted to point out that I didn't forget about Jeff Bailey (he turned thirty on 11/19), I just didn't have anything to say. And since I probably won't bother with Jonathan Van Every, he turns twenty-nine on Thanksgiving. Happy birthday and many happy returns to both of them.

Happy Birthday JD!

There's another new thirty-three year old today in the form of JD Drew. He's not the most interesting player to ever don the uniform but he doesn't have to be. He's very grounded; very real. I think that's why I like that picture so much: moments later when he was grabbed by a reporter (it was probably Joseph and his Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat wannabe Craig Seger) he was totally and utterly composed but here? Not so much.

So happy birthday JD. Maybe before you blow out your candles you should wish for stronger intervertebral discs.

Tim Wakefield: Nice Guy.

By all accounts Tim Wakefield is a more than decent person. He's kind. He's generous with both his time and his money. He's humble. He's thoughtful. He's unassuming, uncomplaining, and undemanding. If he had a boat, he'd probably take it out for the express purpose of searching out injured Floridian marine mammals so that he could rescue them and nurse them back to health in his backyard. We should all aspire to be Tim Wakefield when we grow up.

One person who does just that is Eri Yoshida. She's a tiny Japanese girl (5'0", 114 lbs.) who throws a knuckleball and was recently hired to pitch for a Japanese baseball team, the Kobe 9 Cruise. Whether they brought her on because of a genuine interest in her talent or as a publicity stunt to ignite interest in a fledgling baseball league remains to be seen. But perfectly gracious Wake had this to say in a text message he sent to, presumably, the Red Sox PR department.

"Hope I can see her pitch one day. I'm honored that someone wants to become me. I wish her the best of luck. Maybe I can learn something from her. It's funny that I've reached that point in my career that people want to emulate me. I'm glad I had people like the Niekros, Charlie Hough and Tom Candiotti that I could look up to. I am deeply humbled that it is me this time."

Sentiment aside, the image of Wake sitting on his back porch, hunched over a cellphone dwarfed by his massive hands, while laboriously typing his thoughtful message-because you know that he uses proper spelling, punctuation, and capitalization-instead of just calling amuses me. A lot.

You Can Read About That on the Interweb.

Dustin Pedroia put a call in to The Big Show on 'EEI this afternoon. Although he does insinuate that he's been bumping off the people who cross him, there's nothing too ground-breaking in what he says. It's an honor to even be considered for the award. He plans on working just as hard next year. Blah, blah, blah. Cliche, cliche, cliche. But then at 10:54 he drops this nugget:

"Um, I'll watch a little bit. I actually kinda learned how to get on the Internet here in the last couple months. So-"

*Blink*

He does mean here as in here in Arizona, right? Right? Not "here in the last couple of months" as in "I have been on Mars for the last decade, in a cave, with my eyes shut and my fingers in my ears." He does follow it up with a chuckle but it doesn't sound as if he's joking. If it was a joke, it would be a very strange joke to make. And they seem to take him at face-value, as if admitting to being unable to use the Internet was a completely normal thing for an individual in their mid-twenties to say.

I know that Papelbon has said that the only thing that he can do with a computer is check his e-mail but that doesn't sound as shocking. Pedroia went to college for God's sake. Even if all he did was play baseball and study underwater basket-weaving, surely he would have been exposed to computers and the Internet. He can't be that oblivious, can he?

It boggles the mind.

Another One for the Shelf.

Once again congratulations go out to Dustin Pedroia. This time for being named the AL MVP.

*Update*

Looking at the photos from Pedroia's presser, I realized just how much I miss baseball and my second baseman.

This, however, is a truly awful photo:

Happy Birthday David!

David Ortiz turns thirty-three today. What else is there to say but happy birthday? The man is kind and generous. He's well-liked. He's effective when healthy. And he has his very own sense of style.

A Moveable Feast.

A heads up: The date of the Lowell Spinners dinner has been changed to January 12, 2009.

They also mentioned that the recipient of this year's Dick Bernandino Alumni Award will be Jed Lowrie. Jed was a decent shortstop but this part of the announcement:

"Overall, Lowrie hit .258 with two home runs and 46 RBI, playing stellar defense and filling the void created by Julio Lugo."

seems a little harsh on poor Julio.

Anyway, congratulations to Jed.

Dear Santa: III.

Break out the bicycle pump, have I got a product for you this week. Barring a collision with buried sticks or pointy rocks, it's an inflatable sled. No hills? No snow? No worries; it pulls double-duty as a pool float. And what's more, it's reportedly great fun indoors as well.

Happy Birthday Julio!

Julio Lugo turns thirty-three today. Lugo has his problems but he does have being a good teammate going for him-he seemed to always be one of the first to congratulate someone else on the team. So, happy birthday and let's hope 2009 turns out to be a better year.

Sox on the Town.

The other night (Thursday to be precise) Theo Epstein delivered the key note address at Enterprise Bank's Celebration of Excellence. As part of his speech, Epstein issued five points to a better business. They are: 1. Setting a clear standard. 2. Build a clear process. 3. Surround yourself with good people. 4. Focus on the big picture. And 5. Embrace your values. So there you have it, you too can run a business like Theo Epstein.

If you're willing to head down to the wilds of Worcester (I have a cousin who lives in Worcester and the street he lives on is not paved) tonight, you could catch a glimpse of Jason Varitek. Varitek will be appearing at the Y.O.U. ball at the DCU center. Y.O.U. is an organization that provides services and programs for at-risk youths.

Happy Birthday Curt!

A happy forty-second birthday to Curt Schilling. It's hard to explain the affection I have for a man who drives me nuts and with whom I rarely agree but it's there. So instead of trying, I'll include a birthday wish from the Ramones.

Silver and Gold.

Dustin Pedroia collected the silver slugger award today. Congratulations to him.

DeMarlo Gets His Turn.

DeMarlo Hale's interview with Seattle Mariners is this morning. I would wish him lucky but it would be a shame to lose one of the few working stoplights in Boston (not my joke but I liked it so I took it.)

Pining for Ms. Mae?

Not me. Couldn't stand her. But if she was what floated your boat, Hazel Mae has found herself a job at MLB Network as a reporter on MLB Tonight.

Says the ever talented Ms. Mae:

"I am over the moon to be part of the inaugural on-air team at MLB Network," Mae said. "I knew it would take a special opportunity to leave New England, where they live, eat and breathe baseball. I'm beyond humbled."

Peachy.

Come to the Dominican!

On December 6 David Ortiz will be hosting the first annual David Ortiz Celebrity Golf Classic at the Punta Espada Golf Club in the Domincan Republic to benefit the David Ortiz Children's Fund. The fund raises money for critical pediatric care for patients in both the D.R. and in New England.

He sounds like a little kid talking about his upcoming birthday party when talking about the event:

"I'm pretty excited. When you get to help people and put them in a better situation, I think that's a wonderful feeling," said Ortiz. "It's a beautiful course. I think everybody will love to come down there, and one way or the other, help with this, and have fun at this crazy, beautiful place."

and

"A lot of them want to come," Ortiz said of his teammates. "There are some guys, they're planning for this. Their vacation is going to be planned around there. This place is amazing. I've already talked to tons of guys. I talked to [Dustin] Pedroia, I talked to Mikey Lowell, [Josh] Beckett, [Justin] Masterson, [Jonathan] Papelbon. I invited everybody and pretty much everybody is going to come."

On a side note, I've got to stop reading so quickly. The "I owe this city a lot" at the bottom of the article became "I own a lot of this city." *Blink*

A Simple Request.

Please tell me that David Ortiz is not a parrothead. Tell me he's not a middle-aged ex-hippie, dreaming of a life spent drunken on a beach while toiling away at his work-a-day job and never doing anything about his unhappiness. Tell me that he's just got lousy taste in food and goes to cheesy chain restaurants with volcanoes and fake airplanes hanging from the ceiling. Tell me that he just happened to be unlucky enough on this night to get caught in the middle. That's all I want to hear.

Awards Night.

On January 10 in Kansas City, Jacoby Ellsbury will be presented with the James "Cool Papa" Bell Award by the Negro Leagues Baseball Museum. The award is given to the AL and NL stolen base leader. If nothing else, it probably has the best name for an award. Congratulations to him.

Can the Starsky Award be Far Behind?

On January 21 Jon Lester will be presented with the Hutch Award.



The award is presented to the "Major League Baseball player who best exemplifies the honor, courage and dedication of baseball great Fred Hutchinson, both on and off the field." Lester was selected by a committee made up of the past award winners from the following list:

Rocco Baldelli, Tampa Bay Rays
Lance Berkman, Houston Astros
Doug Davis, Arizona Diamondbacks
Ken Griffey Jr., Chicago White Sox
Raul Ibanez, Seattle Mariners
Cliff Lee, Cleveland Indians
Jon Lester, Boston Red Sox
Aaron Rowand, San Francisco Giants
Mark Teahen, Kansas City Royals
Vernon Wells, Toronto Blue Jays

So, congratulations to him.

Millsie's Big Chance.

At some point today Brad Mills will be interviewing to be the manager of the Seattle Mariners. I don't know whether to wish him luck or not but I suppose I should.

*Update* In the Seattle Times there was a list of all the candidates the Mariners were considering and while Mills and DeMarlo Hale were on the list, there was no John Farrell. I was certain that someone (the Herald, maybe?) had him on Seattle's list.

Civic Duty.

The voting for the This Year in Baseball awards is open through December 5. Personally, I'm repeatedly voting for Evan Longoria throwing the ball into the stands. But, you know, I'm not bitter or anything.

Dear Santa: Part Deux.

Last week I introduced you to the Red Sox pedal car and, presumably, you all ran out and purchased one right away. Well, what better way could there be to accessorize your new set of wheels than with a pair of David Ortiz fuzzy dice?

If you didn't purchase the pedal car, then I don't know what to say. I suppose that maybe you might have found yourself too big to fit in it or maybe you were hoping for something a little more subtle, either way the fuzzy dice could easily be the product for you.

Whether you drive a sports car, a jalopy, or something in between, spruce up your vehicle with a pair of David Ortiz fuzzy dice. Because nothing says "I love you David" like a pair of dice with missing sixes dangling from your rear-view mirror.

Fenway of the Future.

Yesterday the lack of anything interesting to write about had me contemplating making up news. That's not the case today.





Next season Fenway park will feature 560 new places to sit. And if Lucchino has his way, you'll be able to sit in those seats for the 2012 All-Star game. Even though Fenway did just host the All-Star game in 1999, I think it would be a nice gesture on the part of MLB to let them do it again for their centennial celebration.

Can Somebody Please Call a Medic?

It seems that Terry Francona has been chewed on and spat out. From the Herald:

"Francona will undergo an arthroscopic procedure on his left knee today and tomorrow will get an injection for his ailing hip. Francona, who had his right knee replaced several years ago, is trying to postpone a left knee replacement for at least another year.

Meanwhile, Francona recently learned he’s suffering from a torn labrum in the hip, the same malady that ended Mike Lowell’s season and led to surgery last month.

Finally, Francona has yet another appointment Tuesday with a back specialist to determine surgery options."

Oof. A safe and speedy recovery (and a bit of good news healthwise) is in order.

Pedroia Rakes Them In.

Although the official announcement doesn't come out until 4 this afternoon, Bradford is reporting that Pedroia was awarded the Gold Glove. So, congratulations to him. It's well deserved.

He plays hard and makes some impressive plays. It was surprising when he dove and didn't end up with the ball. Given his tendency to mouthiness, however, I'm not sure I'd want to be around him right now. He'd probably gladly tell you that it was about time and he that he should have won last year and the year before that.

Got a Beat-Up Glove, a Homemade Bat, and a Brand New Pair of Shoes.

Alright, so it's not homemade; it's a Louisville Slugger. But it is quite old.

It's the kind of story that the folks at PBS and Antiques Roadshow would love: Shoved in the corner of a Yarmouth Port garage for years was an old wooden baseball bat. Nobody thought anything of it or treated it any differently than any other old baseball bat. In fact, (this is the part they would be none to pleased with) occasionally they took it out and used it. But the bat is not an ordinary bat. It is, in fact, a bat that was used by Bobby Doerr during the 1930s.

The bat's current owner is Art Goodall. Before that it belonged to Goodall's father-in-law and before that, presumably, Bobby Doerr. Goodall's wife, Jane, died from a brain cancer two years ago. As a result, Goodall has decided to sell the bat-in his wife's honor-to raise money for cancer research.

Goodall hasn't yet made a determination of how he's going to sell the bat but in the meantime, if you're the generous sort, donations can be made to:

Arthur & Jane Goodall Family Gift Fund

P.O. Box 770001

Cincinnati, OH 45277-0053.

Dear Santa: Premier.

Although the weather is about to take a turn for the better, it's still November. Both my birthday and Halloween have come and gone. Baseball is well and truly over. It's going to get dark disturbingly early this morning. The sea breeze has turned into a bracing wind. And I would swear that I saw a few snowflakes the other day. It's clearly time to start thinking about hunkering down to wait out the winter. But there are a few important things that need to be taken care of first.

If Thanksgiving is big (and it is), then Christmas is huge. Let's just leave it at: I can out holly-jolly the best of them. In order to aid the the acquisition of Red Sox related products, I've been mulling over creating a series of merchandise related posts for the past week and a half. I wasn't entirely certain I wanted to take on the project (as I envisioned it) but when I checked my e-mail today there was an advertisement for exactly the type of thing I was thinking of. If ever there was a sign, then this was one.

The Red Sox Pedal Car.

It's the coolest mode of transportation for tiny people everywhere. Why ride a bike when you can tootle around in this? Environmentally conscious and physically exhausting, it's a calorie burning juggernaut. Squeeze yourself in and take a trip down to the corner store. Just imagine the looks you'll get.

My Mother Taught Me Well.

This photo of Mike Lowell rehabbing appeared on Bradford's 'EEI blog a few days ago. The first thing I noticed was not itty-bitty Mike Reinold's gigantic smile. Nor was it that Mike Lowell and I have very similar taste in socks. Nope. The first thing I noticed was the state of their walls. "Why are their walls so dirty?" I demanded of my computer. Seriously. You'd think that if they weren't going to clean them, they'd at least be able to afford a new coat of paint.

Happy Birthday Covelli!

Today marks Coco Crisp's twenty-ninth birthday. I don't know why he became my favorite player. I suspect it has something to do with his Junior-esque batting stance. It might just be that he patrols centerfield. It could be his intelligence. It could be his humor. It could be his humility. But whatever it is, he absolutely is.

I hope that whatever happens to him next season (I read that Chicago might be interested) he enjoys himself. I hope that he gets back to what he was at the end of his time in Cleveland. Mostly I hope that he has many happy and healthy returns of the day. I also hope that his Dad is doing alright.