Him?

True Story: When I read that the Sox had avoided arbitration with Tyler Thornburg, I said to myself, "Who?"

So, yeah, not Dombrowski's finest signing.

Phew.

There's an older gentleman who does his grocery shopping at the same time, in the same store that I do. I've never spoken to him or seen him anywhere else besides Stop and Shop but I hate him. He's a Yankees fan. But he's only willing to proclaim his team loyalty by wearing his stupid Yankees t-shirt the day after they win. If they lose on Saturday (I go grocery shopping on Sunday morning) he wears normal, non-jackass clothing. It makes me glad.

One would think that with time and the general good fortune my team has had, I would be able to get over it. But I don't think that I really will.

I am willing to admit that being a Yankees fan doesn't necessarily make you a jackass. I have yet to meet a Yankees fan who isn't one but I am willing to concede that such a person might exist. It remains a terrible character flaw and I doubt that I could ever be convinced otherwise.

And so the day that the Yankees don't win? That's a good day.

Today is a good day.

With Cat-Like Tread (Upon Our Prey We Steal.)

Alright, Slick. Listen up.

We all know that you're not necessarily a guy who does well under pressure. We've all seen it. But we've also seen that there's a good pitcher in there. Let him come out this afternoon.

Spine of steel, buddy.

One Last Gasp.

No pressure, Mr. Fister but it all comes down to you. And what a story that would be, the big guys in the rotation fail to get it done but the guy claimed off waivers in June manages to keep the season going. But like I said, no pressure.

Think Cleveland (but without the lead-off home run.)

My Eyes are Fully Open (to My Awful Situation.)

Well, pigeons. It's quite a pickle you've gotten yourselves into.

I think that most people probably would have picked the Astros to win the series but one would have liked it, if you could have been at least a little bit competitive. But what's done is done.

So we turn, as one does in times of difficulty (if jaunty Gilbert and Sullivan doesn't do it for you) to New Englander--if not by birth, then at least by heritage and nature--Robert Frost:

Len says one steady pull more ought to do it.
He says the best way out is always through.
And I agree to that, or in so far
As that I can see no way out but through—
Leastways for me—and then they’ll be convinced.

"A Servant of Servants" (ll. 55-59)

Onward gentlemen! Win.

A Tarantella!

Me thinks I see a spark! A gleam! A glimmer of a plan!
With which perhaps I may redeem me honor as a man!
Forget to hit, pitch real bad and you'll have John to thank!
For when the time is right, you'll see the Astros walk the plank!

Oh! When was such a princely plot concocted by another?
To lose today and then to keep the winning for October.

Tra-la-la-la!
Tra-la-la-la!
Tra-la-la-la!
Tra-la-la-la!

Oooh! And keep the winning for October!

Yo-ho!
Yo-ho!
Yo-ho!
Yo-ho!

To Fenway!
To Fenway!
To Fenway!
To Fenway!
To Fenway!
To Fenway!
To Fenway!
To Fenway!
To Fenway!
To Fenway!
To Fenway!
To Fenway!


To Fenway.

(Or at least we can hope that this is some master plan.)

Ouch.

Thought for the Day.

 

 Rajai Davis has a lot of teeth. He grew up not all that far from a nuclear power plant, so has anyone counted? Does he have extra? It almost seems like his jaw could open like the clown from It and there might be a second set behind those chompers.

...

So, let me get this straight: Despite the fact that you're all a bunch of big fat cheaters, that's the best that you could do? It gives me the willies to imagine just how piss-poor you'd be if you didn't know what was coming.

Whatever. This season is giving off a very 2011-ish vibe anyway.

Son, be a Dentist.

Yuck.

Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit.

Well, that went exactly how you drew it up didn't it. Chris Sale gives up a billion runs, Kimbrel blows the lead, Christian Vazquez hits a walk-off home run, and the team is back in first. Baseball is a crazy game.

Uff Da.

This team is so very bad. So very very bad.

They can't hit. They can't field. They can't run. Sometimes they can pitch a little bit but it's almost 1 AM and they are striking out against Mike Bolsinger, so who really cares? They need a bat (or eight) but this team, should they make the playoffs, isn't going to go very far so buying a bat (or eight) would be a waste of resources. You can't replace the entire lineup.

Plus, they're boring. And tedious. And bad at baseball.

Second!

Wooo-hoo?

First!

That was a weird one.

If you'd have asked me four days ago, I would have told you that going into Houston behind the Ps I would have been happy with one victory. I don't know which P I would have thought would have produced that victory but I suppose Pomeranz is as good as any of them.  But then the Yankees lost and the Yankees lost and the Yankees lost and that tie was just there for the taking.

So kudos to Price. It wasn't pretty or ideal or what you'd really want from David Price but given how things have been going for him, he held on. And to X.

Hopefully, Mookie and Dustin aren't hurt too much.

It is You.

Gentlemen! Long time, no type. No pressure or anything but I just wanted to point out that a win tonight would put you in a tie for first place. Wouldn't that be neat?

Sigh.

The answer is never Matt Barnes. Even if the question is:  What is one of  Jean Barnes' sons called? Always go with the other one.

Getting Fitted for His Pinstripes.

To recap:

Buck Showalter starts the season (before anyone even has a chance to ask, How was your winter?) with his twee passive-aggressive folderol about how the Red Sox are a bunch of big babies for complaining about the flu but his team is full of manly men who don't complain about the flu. And when called out for trying to needle Boston, gets all cowardly, denies it, and claims that the media is trying to stir things up, not him. What else is that comment supposed to mean, Buck?

Manny Machado slides into Dustin, cleats up. Machado who has a long history of immaturity and bad behavior, claims he wasn't trying to hurt anyone. People with eyes know that that isn't true. Matt Barnes throws at Machado's head. Should Barnes have thrown at Machado? No.

Barnes is suspended for four games. And that is the end of that.

Except...

Dylan Bundy throws at Mookie.

Chris Sale throws at Machado.

Donnie Hart throws at Benintendi.

Machado throws a hissy fit.

Fin.

Well... that's it for today. Way to take the suspense right out of it, Drew.

I am amused that nobody around here wants to see the Cubs. That's fun.

Back to Reality.

So I don't think anyone, maybe with the exception of Rick's mom, thought that he was going to repeat as the winner of the Cy Young, but did anyone think that he was going to be this bad?

Also, Matt Barnes is stupid but Dustin throwing him under the bus, leads one to believe that there are clubhouse issues going on.

Opening Day.

Here's to summer. Here's to stretching out your limbs, shaking off the dust, and being outside. Here's to early sunrises and long, slow nights. Here's to feeling the sun on your skin. Here's to forsythia and the reappearance of green. Here's to growth. Here's to joy and hope. Here's to baseball.

Teamwork Makes the Dream Work.

You try to do 3 somersaults then catch a pop-up.
Not easy. pic.twitter.com/JqR3P1E2v3

— Boston Red Sox (@RedSox) March 23, 2017

Christian Vasquez' laugh is wonderful.

A-Five, Six, Seven, Eight!

A post shared by Robbie Ross Jr. (@therealrobbieross) on Feb 27, 2017 at 2:13pm PST

This, from Robbie Ross Jr., should put a smile on your face. 

Baseball Today.

Maybe it's silly to be so excited for a spring training game (especially because they've already played one) but I'm looking forward to having baseball back on the TV. Hope springs and all that but this could be a special team.

1:05 Minny at Boston on NESN. Be there or be square.

Ghost Runner on Second.

Being a catcher on a professional baseball team is hard on the body, it's bad for the ankles, bad for the knees, bad for the hips, bad for the back, and with one too many backswings to the noggin--bad for the brain. Prime example: Joe Torre, who is apparently losing his marbles.

In rookie ball this year, Torre is instituting a policy for extra innings where teams start the inning with a runner second. Disregarding the oddities of how one would score any play involving said runner and the seeming advantage it gives to the home team, this is beyond a terrible idea.

One of the great things about baseball is that there are no namby-pamby, gold-star-for-everyone ties or super-duper special overtime rules. There is a winner and a loser and you play on, deep into the night, as necessary to determine the outcome. The tension and frustration, the sense of do or die, the hero or the goat, extra innings are the human condition played out before you.

And Joe Torre wants to scrap it all because "It's not fun to watch when you go through your whole pitching staff and wind up bringing in a utility infielder to pitch."

Maybe players don't like it but man is Torre wrong. Extra innings are glorious innings. I turn on games that I have absolutely no interest in otherwise because they've gone to extras. Maybe you pick a team to start but in the end, you end up rooting for whichever team is batting.

But because stupid ideas seem to prevail, we can all look forward to games that end more quickly in the future. Yay!

More Jerry.

NESN announced today that they have signed Remy to a new contract, for which he will serve as color analyst for 115 games per season. I enjoy his insights quite a bit, so this is excellent news. Dave O'Brien really does talk too much but I think that together they make a nice team.