Happy Birthday Happy!

I had given up the birthday project but since Justin Masterson is possibly the sweetest creature to ever walk the face of the earth (no lie) and I didn't wish him a happy birthday last year I'm going to do it now. It may seem like I'm overly effusive with Masterson but he's got a good heart, a good head on his shoulders, and the things he says make me happy, i.e.:

“If you’re good enough, you’ll have a position somewhere. And it’s more fun to root, because I’d rather have a friend when this career is over than anything.”

Plus, he wears high socks.

Happy Birthday Jonathan!

One year ago I wished Jonathan Papelbon a happy twenty-seventh birthday and embarked on this silly birthday project. Having come full circle, Papelbon turns twenty-eight today. He's an idiot and an odd-duck but I love him dearly. So, here's to a continually healthy shoulder, the safe arrival of the bambinos, and a return to dominance to 2009.

I don't recall where I found the scan from Papelbon's high school yearbook (I did edit out the girl though--seemed like the right thing to do.) Those are quite the duds though.

Also, I just wanted to point out that I didn't forget about Jeff Bailey (he turned thirty on 11/19), I just didn't have anything to say. And since I probably won't bother with Jonathan Van Every, he turns twenty-nine on Thanksgiving. Happy birthday and many happy returns to both of them.

Happy Birthday JD!

There's another new thirty-three year old today in the form of JD Drew. He's not the most interesting player to ever don the uniform but he doesn't have to be. He's very grounded; very real. I think that's why I like that picture so much: moments later when he was grabbed by a reporter (it was probably Joseph and his Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat wannabe Craig Seger) he was totally and utterly composed but here? Not so much.

So happy birthday JD. Maybe before you blow out your candles you should wish for stronger intervertebral discs.

Happy Birthday David!

David Ortiz turns thirty-three today. What else is there to say but happy birthday? The man is kind and generous. He's well-liked. He's effective when healthy. And he has his very own sense of style.

Happy Birthday Julio!

Julio Lugo turns thirty-three today. Lugo has his problems but he does have being a good teammate going for him-he seemed to always be one of the first to congratulate someone else on the team. So, happy birthday and let's hope 2009 turns out to be a better year.

Happy Birthday Curt!

A happy forty-second birthday to Curt Schilling. It's hard to explain the affection I have for a man who drives me nuts and with whom I rarely agree but it's there. So instead of trying, I'll include a birthday wish from the Ramones.

Happy Birthday Covelli!

Today marks Coco Crisp's twenty-ninth birthday. I don't know why he became my favorite player. I suspect it has something to do with his Junior-esque batting stance. It might just be that he patrols centerfield. It could be his intelligence. It could be his humor. It could be his humility. But whatever it is, he absolutely is.

I hope that whatever happens to him next season (I read that Chicago might be interested) he enjoys himself. I hope that he gets back to what he was at the end of his time in Cleveland. Mostly I hope that he has many happy and healthy returns of the day. I also hope that his Dad is doing alright.

Happy Birthday Alex!

(And Dougie. And, for that matter, David Murphy.)

Happy thirty-third birthday to Alex Cora. He may not be the best defensively and he may not run particularly quickly but he is a tough out. And for all his faults as a ballplayer, Cora seems like a really good guy. When Bay scored the winning run of the ALDS the team headed toward homeplate, except for Cora-who went to congratulate Lowrie. He took Pedroia under his wing last season. The baby infielders are his ducklings and it's very sweet.

Whither Cora next season? Who knows. I think one writer had him headed out to Seattle to bench coach for his brother. Assuming, of course, that Joey got the job. Regardless, happy birthday and many happy returns.

Happy Birthday Gil!

Well Gil, I don't really know all that much about you but I hope that you've had a blast for the past couple of weeks. I also hope that you have a pleasant birthday and that the next year brings good things for you.

Oh! And I apologize that the only good picture I could find was of you in a Twins uniform. The ones they had of you in a Sox uniform were of you getting elbowed in the head by Van Every and one taken from behind. Mind you, it's not that there's anything wrong with your ass, it just didn't seem particularly appropriate. Cheers on the birthday, though.

Happy Birthday Jason Bay!

Happy thirtieth to Jason Bay.

Like all Canadians, he seems to be a perfectly good, respectful, respectable, upstanding soul. When he first came over the reporters repeatedly tried to get him to badmouth Pittsburgh but he wouldn't do it. He seems like a calm, understated, all-around good guy. He strikes out a little too much for my taste but what do I know?

Here's to a happy birthday and many more for the polite Canadian.

Happy Birthday Chris Carter!

(Lifted from sittingstill.net)

Today is Chris Carter's twenty-sixth birthday.

I don't really know all that much about Chris Carter. I know he needs a hair cut, his dad is a Sox fan, he's a reader, and that when he was at Stamford he thought that he might like to be a pediatric surgeon. And that's about it.

Regardless, happy birthday and many happy returns to Chris Carter.

Happy Birthday Daisuke!

Today marks Daisuke Matsuzaka's twenty-eighth birthday.

When left to his own devices, Matsuzaka is an impressive pitcher. He's got nerves of steel. He's got ice water coursing through his veins. And he's got all the other cliches you can think of to mean he's unphase-able and good under pressure. Undoubtedly, he's also responsible for any number of ulcers in the Greater Red Sox Nation area.

He's a little like Wakefield in that regard, just leave him alone and let him do his thing because he knows what he's doing. It's easy to imagine that had he landed with any other team, the tinkering would have started in an attempt to turn him into an American pitcher rather than a Japanese pitcher pitching in America. Having learned patience from Wakefield, they seem to mostly just let him go and that's probably a good thing. Because while his starts can be painful to watch, he's mostly done a very good job this season.

So happy birthday Daisuke! May you have many happy and healthy returns.

Happy Birthday Ells!

Jacoby Ellsbury turns twenty-five today. So...happy birthday to him.

He seems like a sweet kid. And I know that there's a certain faction of fans enamored of his cheekbones. It is fun to watch him run. Hopefully, he can learn to hit left-handed pitching and become really, really useful.

Regardless, a happy birthday and many happy returns.

Happy Birthday Carl!

Today Carl Yastrzemski turns sixty-nine years old. Spending your birthday in the hospital sucks but that's where most of spent our very first birthday. Have a happy birthday and here's hoping for many more.

Happy Birthday Dustin!

I'd like to wish a happy twenty-fifth to Dustin Pedroia. May he continue to have a great year (where would this team be without him?) and may he continue to have a great time doing it. He's been known to rub some people the wrong way but I hope he never changes.

Happy Birthday Clay!

Today is Clay Buchholz's twenty-fourth birthday. Because of the way he showed up last season, it's easy to forget how very young he is. But no doubt about it, the boy is a veritable baby.

Some birthday wishes for Clay: A new necklace to add to his collection. Some cocky bastard lessons from Pedroia to get over his confidence issues. A big meal to put some meat on his bones. And the opportunity to pitch in Texas in September to appease his father (who was disappointed that Clay didn't pitch in Houston.)

Many happy, healthy, and productive returns of the day.

Happy Birthday Wake!

Today is the forty-second August 2nd that Tim Wakefield has been in the world. Wake is a trooper. An un-sung hero, if you like. He goes out there every fifth day, throws his funky little pitch, usually does his job pretty well, and often to no avail. But you won't hear Wake complain.

He's a good pitcher and, more importantly, a good man. He sponsors the school for disabled kids in Florida. He hangs out at Dana Farber. He's humble, good-natured and solemn. There doesn't seem to be much of anything to dislike about Tim Wakefield.

He's hung around for fourteen seasons (since he was twenty-eight years old.) He's accumulated one hundred and sixty wins during his tenure in Boston. He's third on the list of most winning-est pitcher in Red Sox history behind Cy Young and Clemens (both with 192). His goal is two hundred wins or, at the very least, 193. If only the offense would plate some runs for him, he might be a lot closer to that goal.

But, happy birthday Wake! I'm sorry they couldn't get you another win last night. I hope that you continue to do your thing and achieve your goal--because you far out-class Roger. Many happy and healthy returns to you!

Happy Birthday Javier!

I suppose I haven't always been fair to you. I've criticized your pitching ability and I've openly expressed shock when you've done well. And what's more, none of my poor behavior was on you-I've got no beef with you-it was just that you seemed to be the biggest obstacle to my man Craig [Aside: I haven't decided (or, in actuality, worked up the courage) yet whether to hit publish or not on my post about Breslow's pitching the other day. Maybe, eventually, I will.] making the team out of spring training and as such, you were fair game for all the cattiness I could muster. The silliness just got away from me and for that I apologize.

When you think about it, there really was no reason to choose Breslow over you. You have similar stories: you're both really smart guys who could easily have had perfectly lucrative and respectable careers outside of baseball but you both chose to forgo an average life and to take a big chance on a dream. You're a better looking guy (taller, stronger, nicely spaced features, strong jaw line, great eyelashes, and a pleasant smile) so that can't be it. You've displayed more personality than Breslow; all I know about Craig is that he's very, very, very competitive and you've exhibited a sense of humor (always a good thing) and you played the tuba in high school (which has to count for something.) Also, I think I read somewhere that your father was in the FBI; growing up with Mulder must have left you with at least a couple of interesting stories to tell.

And so for your thirty-first birthday, Javier Lopez, I've decided to make a sincere effort to be kinder to you. I hope you enjoy many happy and healthy returns of the day. How about that for a start? Pretty good, huh? No sarcasm at all.

Happy Birthday Sean!

Today marks Sean Casey's thirty-fourth birthday. To be honest, I didn't know much about Sean Casey when he first showed up here. But with a-mile-wide grin plastered to his face (perhaps he was hired to replace Hinske in more ways than one), a twinkle in his pale blue eyes, an apparent love of wrestling, stories about eating food off the floor, his nutty batting stance, and being ready to go to the mattresses, he's worked his way into my heart. And he's not a bad baseball player to boot. There's an open and honest quality about him that's very appealing. So happy birthday Sean and many happy returns.

Happy Birthday Manny!

Happy 36th birthday to Manny Ramirez. Perhaps he's a bit of a misunderstood soul but I really don't understand how anyone could dislike Manny Ramirez. He loves to play the game and he loves to have fun playing the game (and yes, he does occasionally have what amounts to a temper tantrum) but he's great fun to watch. And this? This is awesome.

I hope his old buddy Millar took him out for a drink last night to celebrate. I hope that he continues to just do his thing. And I hope that he has many more happy birthdays ahead of him.