The Many Faces of Roger Clemens.

Knowing that one of my own beloveds might find his way onto the list, I'm trying very hard to temper my glee at the Alex Rodriguez story.

I also feel kind of bad for my cousin's husband. Born and raised in Vermont, he was a huge Roger Clemens fan--so much so that his two-year-old dog is called Clemens. When Roger left, Cousin-in-Law Tom decided that he was no longer going to be a Red Sox fan. He threw his allegiance to the Yankees and, as it turned out, it was good timing on his part. Recently I learned that his two favorite current Yankees are Andy Pettitte (hee!) and Alex Rodriguez (double hee!). I'm sure that there's a joke to be made about him only liking PED-users but I don't think he'd take too kindly to it--beside having the major character flaw of being a Yankee fan, he's kind of a humorless guy.

Tomorrow afternoon's (2/8) programming on the MLB Network might be perfect for him, though. At noon, a fire-balling twenty-three-year-old Clemens fans twenty Mariners. And then at 3:00, a paunchier thirty-three-year-old Clemens logs his last win as a member of the Red Sox and strikes out twenty Tigers in the process.